IFAQs

Sometimes, websites have FAQs: Frequently Asked Questions. But sadly, sometimes these helpful facts do not contain the answers we seek. To assist with your less common questions, here are some helpful Infrequently asked questions.

Is “Popcorn” your real last name? If not, why’d you put it as your name?

Uh, no. Sorry. It is a snack I enjoy eating though. I put it as my name ’cause it sounds COOL!!! 🙂

Can I write a post on your blog?

No, but you can start your own blog!!

I want to upload a picture of my cat eating canned soybeans a la mode on your blog. Can you please help?

Try clicking and dragging the picture. If that doesn’t work, IDK. On a separate, but equally important note, are soybeans a la mode good for your cat?

Are you related to Naomi of Naomi and Ruth?

Not that I know of, but that would be cool!

Can I have your email, phone number, social security code, address, or other personal information to stalk you with?

Sorry, but no. Also, don’t you have anything better to do with your life?

My pet fish is floating on the top of his/her tank. Help!!!

Um, I’m not a vet, but your fish is probably dead. I send my condolences.

What does the word astrolabe mean?

Why do you want to know? What does this have to do with my blog?

astrolabe |ˈastrəˌlāb|
noun chiefly historical
an instrument formerly used to make astronomical measurements, typically of the altitudes of celestial bodies, and in navigation for calculating latitude, before the development of the sextant. In its basic form (known from classical times), it consists of a disk with the edge marked in degrees and a pivoted pointer.
ORIGIN late Middle English : from Old French astrelabe, from medieval Latin astrolabium, from Greek astrolabon, neuter of astrolabos ‘star-taking.’

What does it mean when a number has ! after it?

Again, completely unrelated, but… That means that it is a factorial. 5!=5x4x3x2x1, or 120.

If I want to read a post on your blog but I don’t have access  computer, how do I do that?

First of all, how do you know about my blog/are reading this answer if you don’t have access to a computer? But anyway, go to a library or borrow a friend’s or something.

How do I upload a comment in a weird font/color on your blog?

Easy: you don’t.

What do I do if I have an IFAQ that’s not answered here?

Check out my newest post!

How come you don’t write about how to properly cook escargot on ice?

Well, because that just sounds nasty, and because  I don’t know how to or care to know how to. But you can write your own post on your own blog!

If I start a blog on escargot on ice, will you faithfully read it every day?

Uh….

Please!!!

Well, uh, um…

Come on!

No.

Can I erect a bust of you?

Sure! Go ahead!!!

Do you like blue cheese on toast?

I have never had blue cheese on toast. Good idea, though!

Who is the creator of this blog?

ME!!

Why do you have a blog?

Cuz I want to!!

Why are all these posts about you?

I am the author of this blog! I can make it about me if I want to!

how do i look at your ifaqs page?

However you got on this page to read the answer!

Hi. I was just wondering, is it true that if you spin four and a half time counter-clockwise while chanting “I am not afraid of butterflies” over and over you’ll go a week into the future?

Uh, no. But it could cure you of butterfliaphobia! (Who has that?)

What is the definition of the worst word you know?

I’d tell you, but my blog needs to be rated PG or PG13 at the most!

Thanks, my dear friends, for asking dumb questions!

2 thoughts on “IFAQs

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s